Sunday, February 19, 2012

Simple things

Lately I have been waxing nostalgic for our days of hard labor. Life seemed so simple back then. Such finite goals...gutting and renovating a bathroom for example. And the rewards of the labor are so very tangible. I find that I like tangible things.

I've written on this blog about my visceral discovery of being so present in the moment, seeing my hands after sanding oak board after oak board one day and feeling truly connected. It was almost a spiritual experience for me. And I must say, I don't get that feeling from working with my hands on say...a computer. Talk about not being in the moment...Facebook, constant newsfeeds, email that is never finished...no- those things are not satisfying to me. I find them actually extremely draining. Yet, ironically enough I sit here posting on of all things, a blog!

But I'm here talking to you who have perhaps had a common experience working on your own home and projects. And writing is my other craft, so it is a release not a chore (email) or a compulsion (Facebook).

It's easy to lament the state of things now anyway I suppose. We're worlds away from the housing boom these days. I wonder how many housebloggers lost their beloved homes the past few years. So, yes, things have changed and it does feel different.

I told Steve that I am itching for a project. We do have a "biggie" that is on the distant horizon and that will be our basement, which will require a dig out and a steel i-beam. That's the 5-year plan, which is a ways off. At this point, there are some among us, who do something drastic like buy another house and "start over." I don't see myself doing this. I've seen many housebloggers have kids and of course, then life becomes so busy, who has time to blog or DIY- as much anyway?

We haven't gone that route. Always a hesitation about the kid-thing here, so no dice. It's okay, I have a really sweet niece and nephew and I enjoy being an "auntie."

I am really so glad I documented all the work we did on this blog. It's really quite something to go back over it, which I seldom do, and think, "Wow, we actually did all that. How crazy is that?" I remember the very long days, the exhaustion, laying on the sofa watching Forensic Files together-totally zonked, slices of pizza from JB Albertos for dinner, washing dishes in the basement, sitting at my desk on Monday in mild traction... I remember how our dog Billie would lay down next to Steve no matter that he was drilling or sawing. She grew up with construction abound and remains completely unphased by such noises.

How to recapture that feeling of purpose is something I wrestle with occasionally. But, of course, we cannot go back- only forward. And it's always easy to wax nostalgic about the past. I saw "Midnight in Paris." I get it, but it doesn't stop me from doing it.

Maybe there are certain times of one's life that are the happiest. I honestly don't think these past few years with so many people suffering unemployment and hardship have been so very "happy." It's more "make the best of it" in my book. Try to enjoy, despite the horrific nightmare moment in time we have the misfortune of  living in. I guess that sounds pretty doom and gloom, but sometimes it feels that way to me. How can anyone be oblivious to what is happening around us, even if we have been fortunate enough to hang on to our jobs or homes?

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